Commenter Roy cracked me up with his description of "Turknology":
There are a couple useful words some friends and I coined while living in Turkey. Turknology allowed one to jack a broken truck up on wooden blocks, then build a small fire under it so one could see what was broken on the undercarriage. It also allowed you to to plug the telephone wires that come out of the wall into 220v. Then all you have to do go to the ground floor and run a screwdriver over the telephone block until you get big sparks. This is how you identify the correct wires!
I laugh because last week, I finally got the refrigerator fixed. Seriously, it was so hard for me to get the master out I was envisioning life without a refrigerator and thinking it wouldn't be all that bad.
My less-than-year old refrigerator's motor broke. Yes, I know it should have been under warranty. No, I had no clue how to administer the warranty service process.
"JUST FIX IT! I WILL PAY." I could say that.
Two masters arrived with their equipment. Removing and repairing the motor required welding. In my wood kitchen. The kitchen was filled with freon gas and the smell of welding. What could possibly go wrong?
The smoke alarm screeched. The masters looked at me and asked "what's that?"
Also, the master came to fix the leaking skylight/roof. It, too, requiring welding.