Carpetblogger

The American Gangster Movie Is Dead: Discuss

I watched American Gangster the other night, and not too long ago, The Departed. Both have garnered critical praise and award nominations and have stellar casts. Who doesn't love Denzel Washington and Russell Crowe, Matt Damon and Mark Wahlberg?

These movies bored me out of my ever-loving mind.

With the economies and political systems of large swaths of the world dominated by "gangs" or "clans," Americans have little new or interesting to say about the inner workings of the modern criminal operation. American filmmakers are still telling the stories of dirty cops, feisty gangsters from the 'hood or the Italian or Irish mafias. Snooze.

When I hear the words "American Gangster," I yawn. When I hear "Russian Oligarch" I start to pay attention. The material is so rich and as yet, unexplored.

So why isn't anyone making gangster movies about Russia, the Caucasus or Central Asia, where entire economic and political systems are clan-based kleptocracies, or Afghanistan, Lebanon or Iraq where violent tribalism governs every aspect of life? It seems to me that good stories about how criminal enterprises supplant rule of law and shape human behavior would come from these places, rather than boring old America or Europe.

America is not a complete creative wasteland when it comes to portraying lawlessness, however. As I've written here in the past, Deadwood was the best characterization of life in a chaotic boom town that I've ever come across.

I Will Not Download This Movie

"I can't believe we're paying to watch something we could see on TV for free! If you ask me, everyone in this theater is a big sucker! Especially, you!"

Even though I see most movies within days or weeks of their U.S. release, I can't remember the last time I was in a movie theater. (Azerbaijan's only meaningful cultural contribution: pirated movies). The Simpsons (Simpsonlar, in Turkish) seemed worth the effort of a subway trip to the one cinema around that's showing it in English.

Guests came from as far as Kyiv and Baku, so we made a night of it last night, starting out at the UK noodle chain Wagamama. After the waiter genuinely apologized for forgetting a glass of wine, we had to tell our friend from Kyiv to shut up already about how great the service and how friendly everyone is in Istanbul.

If you're going to see the most American of movies, it's only appropriate that you watch it in the most American of settings: the Mall.  However, Istanbul's Kanyon Mall (it has its own wikipedia page) shares few characteristics with many malls I've been in. It is by far the most elegant shopping space I have ever been in. Quality shops, good restaurants, nice bars. It's not just a mall, it's a lifestyle!

The theater sits in pod in the center of the mall. I can't remember the last time I saw a movie from a velour-covered barcalounger on a giant screen with no screaming children. This theater was plush and tickets were no more expensive than those in a big U.S. city. It was awesome!

Why go to see this movie if you are not American?  Why see it if you don't speak English as your native tongue? I do not know. but five Americans in Istanbul were rolling, not just because the jokes come fast but because the Turks didn't get the best ones. The Simpsons movie is 18 years of American awesomeness in 90 minutes. You wouldn't understand.

The New Cold War

Russians are bad. Sure, there's the murders, and the poisonings, and all those other reasons La Russophobe comes up with every day, but let's get down to brass tacks here.

Borat. No one can get their hands on Borat, and it's the Russians' fault. Because the movie was banned in Russia for "humiliating content," (is it possible to shame a Russian? Discuss), it's not being pirated. Because it's not being pirated (the only thing Russians are really good at, other than, uh, poisoning people), it is not available in Baku's DVD emporia, so the Producer has been unable to Produce the one thing everyone wants.

Furthermore, because Russian and Ukrainian theaters use the same distributor, it won't be shown in Kyiv, legitimately, either. And no one around here has the bandwidth to download it.

The glorious expat community in Kyiv is wearing their sad faces.

The Film Event of the Year

This one will probably sell out immediately at Baku's Hong Kong DVD, since it is the most anticipated pirated movie of the year.

Via Registan, here are the first four minutes AND deleted scenes from Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit of Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan.