Inspiration often comes from the unlikeliest sources. Carpetblog recently came across the NYT India Ink blog's new "Agony Auntie" feature, designed to help expats in India avoid embarrassment. We thought "How useful! We know lots of people who could benefit from something like that. Someone should do it for Turkey."
So, we reached out to The Unaccompanied Lady. Because there are few expat issues on which Carpetblogger and Unaccompanied Lady do not have informed opinions and because we agree on nearly everything, this will be a joint venture. We plan to distinguish ourselves from India Ink's feature by making it clear from the outset that helping expats -- especially people we know -- avoid embarrassment is low on our list of objectives. Also, it won't be lame.
In the unlikely event we can't answer a question, or make up a sufficient response, we will outsource questions to our stable of experts with specialized knowledge of things, such as Borko or Red State Sibling, or other secret, surprise guests whom we have yet to identify (but we have ideas! If you'd like to be considered, send a detailed CV and salary requirements).
Here are some Frequently Asked Questions about this new feature:
What qualifies Carpetblogger for this role? It was our idea, stolen from elsewhere. Therefore, we're best qualified.
What topics will you address? A better question is what topics will we NOT address. The Carpetblog/Unaccompanied Lady areas of expertise include -- but are not limited to -- coping with bureaucracy, birth, breastfeeding and child rearing, primates, music, intercultural understanding, cooking, bribing, sex, dating and relationships, cattle, fashion, current affairs, fine dining, developing cultural sensitivity, ethics, importing pork and liquor, languages and Crapistan.
What topics will you not address? Boring topics. If you want travel advice for Turkey, there's this great new service called google. Try it today!
Will question-askers remain anonymous? Only if the benefit of revealing your identity outweighs your desire to not be humiliated.
Do questions have to be from/about Turkey or from Expats? Of course not! We welcome questions from around the world from all types of people.
How can we submit questions? The world of social media is vast. You can send an SMS, use the contact Carpetblog email link on the blog (but sometimes we forget to check that one), talk to us in the ladies' room at a bar, use Facebook, @Carpetblogger1 or @Unaccompanylady on Twitter, leave it in the comments or use telepathy. It's up to you.
So beat the rush! Send your questions in today. We'll be choosing among the best ones this week!
Hi Carpetblogger!
I'm not sure if this counts as a boring question, but if you've got kids and are English speaking (and not Turkish speaking), what do you do with your kids education-wise? We'd have to live in a tent to afford the international schools. Do many people choose to homeschool?
Posted by: Stagha | 13 March 2012 at 11:03 AM
Stagha -- Thanks! But that sounds like a serious question, the type that might be better answered by people who have/know/like kids. I could certainly make some stuff up, but I don't want to feel responsible for some big therapy bills coming your way. Personally, I am a huge fan of child labor. I think they should pay their way, support the homestead, if you will.
If I were you I would join the fourms on the expat bulletin board www.sublimeportal.com There are lots of folks there who can tell you what's what on this topic.
Good luck!
Posted by: Carpetblogger | 13 March 2012 at 03:04 PM
Dear Carpetblogger, the Eurocup 2012 soccer tournament in Ukraine this year finding that they have sold only half the tickets they should have by now. Europeans soccer hooligan wannabes are blanching at the 500 Euro per night for three star crapotels. My question for you...don't Ukrainians realize that if they don't charge reasonable prices, nobody will come? Yours truly, Kpic
Posted by: Kpic | 13 March 2012 at 10:06 PM
My Dear Carpetblogger,
Against my better judgment I am spending twice as much as I spent on my first car to bring my wife and our three hooligans to Adana to see my in-laws. Much fun and Adana-kebab are anticipated. My question is what present should I bring for my 60 + year old MIL who is fairly conservative? I would like to surprise her, but smuggling booze in for someone who doesn't drink seems like a waste. Any suggestions?
Roy
Posted by: www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=533798519 | 15 March 2012 at 09:16 PM
Ooo roy, good question. I'm going to crowdsource it and get back to you. Anything special we need to know about your MIL?
Posted by: Carpetblogger | 16 March 2012 at 05:52 AM
Anne has always been wonderful to me. Her hair is always covered by something colorful. Except the time we took her too the beach where she let it down to the middle of her back. Once I took her to an outlet mall by Seattle. There was an American woman shopping that had very long, fine hair in a single braid that reached her ass. Anne walked right up behind her and picked that braid up to look at and feel it. I was flabergasted. Fortunately the lady was an understanding hippy chick who started asking Anne questions. Then Anne started asking HER questions. The best I could do was answer the hippy's questions, since I don't understand Anne. Maybe that is why we get along?
Posted by: www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=533798519 | 18 March 2012 at 12:34 AM