Because there are so many easy targets, Out of respect for the rich culture of Azerbaijan, I usually try to ignore ridiculous new stories coming out of Baku. But like the asshole hotel, once they hit outlets like FARK, I feel it's my duty to weigh in and add a bit of cultural context.
The local media recently busted the Camel Toe, a fine drinking establishment in Baku that I have used to illustrate so many anecdotes that Carpetblog (proudly) comes up in google searches of the term. Apparently, the wizards at the state-controlled Today.AZ just discovered what the name means. (Don't know? Wikipedia does).
The retardedness of taking issue with the name of a bar that has been there for AT LEAST five years is exceeded only by the retardedness of the article itself. Because I don't trust you to click through, I'm going to parse it in this post so you don't miss a morsel.
Azerbaijan is among the most tolerant countries of the world.
This has been repeatedly stated even on state level. Our country serves as an example for other CIS states
This is true, though let's be careful about setting the bar too high. Azerbaijan does compare favorably to Uzbekistan, Turkmenistan and Belarus. However, the Kyrgyz have a real edge in the sheep fucking department and the Moldovans might have better food.
A pub named Camel's toe which initially seems to mean what it means -"A
toe of a camel" functions in the very center of Baku, several meters
away from the passage, at 22. Mamedaliyev street.
But, in fact
the name has a double meaning. The Camel's Toe has a meaning "the clear
visible presence of a woman's vulva as a consequence of wearing overly
right [sic] pants.
A question comes to mind: was it named so on purpose? And what does the
logotype of the pub, which locates in one of the most popular streets
of Baku, mean? (see the photo below).
Impossible! A Baku bar whose primary clientele is snaggle-toothed rig monkeys and the women who love them was absolutely named in honor of the foot of a dromedary. What possible double meaning could be extracted from that?
The girl at the bar said the pub was named on purpose. "Every client
understands it as he wills..." She refused to translate our questions
to the bar owner saying that the latter is aware of the name.
Well, we would not make any conclusions. But several questions arise unwittingly.
Why did they name the pub like that? Could they not understand that this may arise protest among the local population?
I would say the questions arose dimwittedly, but in a country like Azerbaijan which, in addition to its tolerance, is also known for free and open debate in the media, that might be unfair. Also, since the local population utters nary a peep when the national treasure is appropriated by the kleptocracy while IDPs live in holes in the ground, the owners of the Camel Toe probably felt confident that opposition to the name of a bar would be muted.
Perhaps, the British citizens wanted to introduce European culture in Azerbaijan, forgetting about the local mentality?
Perhaps,
they wanted to mock at Azerbaijanis, who are not aware of such details
of British slang? Or perhaps they bound the slang name of the pub with
Azerbaijani ladies, visiting it?
None of the Brits I knew ever tried to introduce any kind of culture, European or
otherwise, to Baku. Furthermore, "camel toes" would be the least unkind thing you could say about any Azerbaijani "ladies" that frequented that bar.
The article is infused with a "I'm shocked! Shocked!" tone at the prospect that prostitution *might* be going on in the neighborhood.
By information, our news agency received, prostitutes are working at
some pubs, providing services to foreign "fat cats" for at least $500.
"Ladies" do not want the local population to see them, therefore, such
establishments are usually private and local residents are not allowed
in.
So by "private" Today.AZ must mean "advertising in all the English language
newspapers" and "garishly signed on the street." And why would any local visit an overpriced pub aimed at foreigners when there are at least eleventy-million sleazy joints offering bargain-basement whores within a 10 block radius that appeal more to the "local mentality" (i.e. young and hairy)? Remember the old Carpetblog rule about bars which you have to walk downstairs to enter?
The sheer number of whorehouses in a downtown area might be yet another area in which Azerbaijan leads the CIS. And when you're
competing against Kyiv and Moscow, that's quite an achievement.
All this manufactured outrage at Today.Az suggests to me that the owner of the Camel Toe got sideways with someone in the government, or ran a whorehouse that provided too much competition to the other brazillion in the immediate vicinity or the local liquor importing cartel decided to play hardball. The Producer, who is once again Carpetblog's on-the-ground eyes and ears, reports that the fuss is the work of a disgruntled employee.